My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
