I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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