After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
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I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
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that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
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