Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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