I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
