mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
false alarm, still single
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