So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize