What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
thus making me awesome and them whores
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
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