The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
