And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Randomize
