I just cut my nipple shaving
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Randomize
