the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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