As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
you made out with another girl for some wings
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
