I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Randomize
