Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Use "feeling words"
Yay
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Randomize
