I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Randomize
