see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
