Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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