last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Randomize
