What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
