i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
... don't judge me
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
These Attractive Criminals Got Modeling Contracts After Getting Arrested
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.