Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
