just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
This is the high leading the old right now
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
