my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
