Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Randomize
