Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
