I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize