lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize
