the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Randomize
