By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
