Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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