I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
