I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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