I'm eating all of the evidence.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
