he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
