I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
