Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
