Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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