she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
