Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
