great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
