Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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