wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
