Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
