OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
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