Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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