i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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