Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Randomize
