Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
