i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Randomize
